"It's early evening-- before dinner time, around five o'clock-- on a Friday in mid October. The sun's down and it's nearly dark, but I'm just noticing. It had seemed light enough just moments ago. I'm eleven or twelve and I'm sitting on the front porch of... what the heck was his name? John or Patrick something? Tip of my tongue but I can't shake it loose. It doesn't matter."
"I'm sitting there on the porch with my friends from the neighborhood all around, riding bikes, chatting, whatever. It's getting chilly out. Maybe I'm sniffling a little, but my body's warm from running around with my friends and I'm comfortable in that way when you can feel the cold creeping around the edges of your skin, but it just can't make it's way in."
"The crispness of the New England air, the quality of the nearly-gone light, the leaves starting to turn, everything's just about perfect and I'm noticing it, actually appreciating it while it's happening. In retrospect it's one of those rare moments of youth where you're actually aware how lucky you are to be young and healthy and free, but let's not ruin this with retrospect. Point is, I'm feeling pretty fine."
"I'll have to go home soon for dinner, and that will be fine too. I'll be hungry soon enough anyway and the kitchen will be warm just as I'm starting to actually feel cold, and my mom and my sister will be there and we'll talk a bit about school and after dinner we'll watch some TV maybe before I go to bed. I can feel that off in my future, so achingly close to taking me away from the now, but still not for a few minutes yet and then after, a whole weekend to myself. At that age my consciousness didn't dare to extend too far beyond the next couple of days. A whole weekend might have been eternity."
"So I'm sitting there, almost excruciatingly happy with this simple thing I have-- these friends, this life-- and as near as I can tell the possibilities of it extend on till forever."
"Yeah? So?"
"So that's what I want being in love to feel like. Find me that and I'm in."
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